Learning Contentment

“Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content” (Phil. 4:11).

My husband has been unemployed the past few weeks, a situation we’ve not experienced together during our entire twenty-six years of marriage. But I remember well the times my father was unemployed. In fact, it wasn’t until mid-life that I realized how much those years impacted me—such as the way I hate to see an empty refrigerator or the way I make certain to never run out of things in the pantry. And while my son and his friends enjoy browsing and shopping at the local thrift store, the thought of doing so produces almost a physical response in me, which I’ve realized is rooted in feelings of shame I felt from times when I had no other choice but to wear pre-owned clothes.

So, when my husband informed me of his change in job status, I felt my stomach tighten. My heart pounded. My eyes burned. And I felt panicked. I was instantly transported back to my childhood where memories of not having enough swirled in my mind, along with all the feelings of worry, uncertainty, and shame. Memory after memory played on a reel, many I hadn’t revisited in decades.

I took a breath and whispered, “this is not the same thing.”

And the Lord gently reminded me of the words of Paul in Philippians 4:

“Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me” (11-13).

The Apostle Paul experienced both times of abundance and times of lack. He knew what it was like to be full and to be empty. Elsewhere in the New Testament, we read of other areas in which Paul experienced hardship and suffering. In 2 Corinthians 11, he listed a number of trials he experienced: “Five times I received at the hands of the Jews the forty lashes less one. Three times I was beaten with rods. Once I was stoned. Three times I was shipwrecked; a night and a day I was adrift at sea; on frequent journeys, in danger from rivers, danger from robbers, danger from my own people, danger from Gentiles, danger in the city, danger in the wilderness, danger at sea, danger from false brothers; in toil and hardship, through many a sleepless night, in hunger and thirst, often without food, in cold and exposure. And, apart from other things, there is the daily pressure on me of my anxiety for all the churches” (vv. 24-28). Talk about suffering!

And yet, regardless of his circumstances, Paul felt contentment. The Puritan minister, Jeremiah Burroughs, defined contentment as: “that sweet, inward, quiet, gracious frame of spirit, which freely submits to and delights in God’s wise and fatherly disposal in every situation.” It is an inner satisfaction in Christ and who he is for us. It is confidence and trust in his faithful provision of grace. It is resting in his character, knowing he only provides that which is good for his beloved children.

Interestingly, the Greek word for contentment in Philippians 4 is only used here in this verse. It means self-sufficient, independent. It was a word used by Greek philosophers to describe self-reliance, of not needing anyone or anything, of being sufficient for everything within oneself. Paul took this secular word from his day and used it to mean Christ-sufficiency. Through the power of the Spirit at work within him, he was sufficient. His strength was found in Christ’s strength. He could face and endure everything, because of Jesus Christ.

As I wrestle with contentment in my own life, I’m encouraged by Paul’s testimony. Specifically that contentment was a lesson Paul learned. It was something he grew in. Not in a sense of learning facts; rather, he learned through experience. He saw God’s goodness to him in times of plenty and in times of want. He experienced God’s strength in the midst of suffering. And through that, he learned the joy of the Lord.

Regardless of his circumstances.

In my own uncertainties these days, I find myself rehearsing the character and goodness of God to my heart. “For the LORD is good; his steadfast love endures forever, and his faithfulness to all generations” (Ps. 100:5).

How about you? Have you learned the secret of contentment?

Photo by Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash

God's Comfort for a Mother's Cares

“When the cares of my heart are many, your consolations cheer my soul” (Ps. 94:19).

A mother has many cares for her children. No matter her children’s age or stage, their needs are never far from her mind. Many of her worries come naturally as the result of living in a fallen world where children catch illnesses, face bullies on the playground, and struggle with academics. In a broken, sin-stained world, she can’t help but have concern for their safety from those who might do them harm. She can’t help but worry about the temptations they face online and with friends. She can’t help but worry about their future.

Indeed, the cares of a mother's heart are many.

While the ESV translates the Hebrew here as “cares,” other translations use the word “anxiety.” “When the anxieties of my heart are many…” The word literally means “disquieting thoughts.” Consider the anxious thoughts you’ve had about your children. Those thoughts that keep you up at night and follow you throughout the day. Thoughts that never seem to let you alone. Thoughts like: What if this illness worsens? What if she gets behind in school? What if he doesn’t make friends? What if we can’t find the help she needs? What if we can’t afford…? What if…?

David Powlison once wrote, “anxiety presumes a great distance between God and my present concern.” But the psalmist reminds us that God does known about our anxieties and cares. This verse is a reminder that God isn’t far away. Our circumstances are not beyond his knowledge and care for us. In fact, the psalmist then tells us that God’s consolations cheer the soul. “Consolation” is another word for comfort. It’s the same word used in Isaiah 66:10-14 where the prophet compares a mother comforting her baby to God’s comfort and care for his people. The word for “cheer” or in other translations, “delight” is to soothe or stroke, just as mother does to calm her baby.

And that’s what the Lord does for us in our anxieties.

Psalm 94 is a psalm about God’s people experiencing injustice at the hand of their enemies. It calls them to wait for the Lord to enact justice on their behalf. And as they wait, to remember who God is for them. He is a covenant keeping God who “will not abandon his heritage” (v.14), whose steadfast love holds them (v.18), and who is their stronghold, a rock of refuge (v.22). In the midst of the fears and anxieties of this life, our God is with us. He comforts us with his presence. Even more, he is our helper and provider. He is our strength and our place of safety. Like a child with his mother, we can run to our Father and find the comfort and help we need.

Calvin comments: “The heavier our calamities grow, we should hope that Divine grace will only be the more powerfully manifested in comforting us under them, but should we through weakness of the flesh be vexed and tormented by anxious cares, we must be satisfied with the remedy which the Psalmist here speaks of in such high terms. Believers are conscious of two very different states of mind. On the one hand, they are afflicted and distressed with various fears and anxieties; on the other, there is a secret joy communicated to them from above, and this in accommodation to their necessity, so as to preserve them from being swallowed up by any complication or force of calamity which may assail them.”

I like how Calvin describes God’s comfort as a “secret joy” that God gives to us. He sees our needs and meets us where we are with his presence. He sooths our hearts with the truths of who he is. He helps us see that he is greater than our fears. And if we have any doubt of his provisions of grace for us, we need look no further than the cross of Christ. As Paul wrote in Romans 8:32, “He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?”

The reality is, we will experience hard and fearful and troubling things in this fallen world. As moms, we will feel anxious for our children. We’ll worry about their health, their growth, their friendships, their safety. We’ll worry about their future. We’ll think all those “what if?” thoughts. But God’s comfort keeps and preserves us from being consumed by our troubles. His consolations soothe our soul. We find him to be our refuge in all our troubles.

Father, I come to you with many concerns and cares for my children. My mind is often filled with questions of “What if this or that happens?” Forgive me for when my anxieties turn my gaze from you and onto my circumstances and I forget that you are greater. I know you love my children far more than I can, for you love with a perfect love. Be with them now. Shower them with your love and grace. Intervene in our circumstances and be our refuge. Comfort my heart. Sooth my soul. Give me that “secret joy” in the midst of worrying circumstances. In Jesus’ name, amen.

Photo by Bethany Beck on Unsplash

When You Worry About All the Things

I often tell my sons I am a better Scout than they are. After all, I live by the motto: Be Prepared. I anticipate all the things that could go wrong and plan accordingly. Rain in the forecast? I have my umbrella at the ready. Cold and flu season around the corner? My medicine cabinet is stocked. Busy day ahead? We leave early in case there’s traffic.

While being prepared is often wise and prudent, for those who are prone to worry, it can sometimes facilitate and increase that worry all the more. Being prepared involves thinking about the future. It involves anticipating trouble that may lie ahead—both of which go hand in hand with worry. I found this to be true with my own heart this summer as I helped one of my sons plan for a backpacking trip out west. I looked at the weather forecast and encouraged him to pack accordingly. I reminded him to pack extra batteries for his headlamp. We prepared for injuries by packing a first aid kit. These were all good things to do.

But then I started thinking about other things that could go wrong: getting separated from the group, encountering bears on the trail, running out of supplies, etc. Add to that the fact that he and his group would be out of cell phone range for most of the trip and I found myself worried even more about those potential troubles. Especially the bears! Those worries festered and woke me up at night. I found my mind focused on future trouble.

In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus speaks to weary hearts that are prone to worry about the future. He says to not worry about the daily needs of life—to not look ahead and worry about what we will eat and drink or what we will wear. He reminds us of how our Father in heaven looks after and cares for his creation, from the birds in the air to the flowers in the field and how much more important are we than they? “Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” (see Matt. 6:25-34).

This is such a familiar passage, one I’ve read countless times. Yet its one that continues to teach me about my heart and about my Father in heaven. Jesus here sets limits for our worries. He tells us there are things we need to focus on and things we don’t need to focus on. He’s not telling us to lay back and do nothing to prepare for tomorrow. After all, the Bible exhorts us elsewhere to labor for our food. To plant seeds and harvest them. To work hard and not be slothful. There is a certain amount of care and concern we should have. What Jesus is speaking about here is excessive worry—worry that is future focused. Worry that lives in tomorrow and not in today. Worry that pushes us to focus on ourselves and doesn’t rest in who our Heavenly Father is for us.

As John Calvin noted:

“…Christ reproves that excessive anxiety, with which men torment themselves, about food and clothing, and, at the same time, applies a remedy for curing this disease. When he forbids them to be anxious, this is not to be taken literally, as if he intended to take away from his people all care. We know that men are born on the condition of having some care…But immoderate care is condemned for two reasons: either because in so doing men tease and vex themselves to no purpose, by carrying their anxiety farther than is proper or than their calling demands; or because they claim more for themselves than they have a right to do, and place such a reliance on their own industry, that they neglect to call upon God…Each of us ought to labor, as far as his calling requires and the Lord commands; and each of us ought to be led by his own wants to call upon God. Such anxiety holds an intermediate place between indolent carelessness and the unnecessary torments by which unbelievers kill themselves. But if we give proper attention to the words of Christ, we shall find, that he does not forbid every kind of care, but only what arises from distrust.”

For those of us who worry about all the things, it can be helpful to make a list of the things God calls us to do and what he does not call us to do and then see where our worries fit. For example, we might create a two-column chart with our responsibilities on one side and those that are God’s on the other. And then we can ask our heart: Are we worried about something that is our responsibility? Or God’s responsibility? Are we focused on the task we’ve been given for today? Or focused on a future that hasn’t yet happened? Are we trusting in ourselves and our own strength? Or have we submitted our cares to God and trusted him to provide what we need?

There are some worries and concerns that deserve our attention because God has entrusted us with specific tasks and responsibilities. We ought to take our child to the doctor when she is ill. We should work hard at our jobs to provide for our family. We need to fix the leaky sink before it gets worse. These are all in our realm of responsibility. But there are other worries that are not under our rule and responsibility. These concerns are the things we bring to our Father in Heaven and seek his wisdom, help, and care. That’s what Jesus pointed out in his sermon: We can trust that God provides for all our needs. The future lies in his hands.

In the situation with my son’s trip to the mountains, there were things I had the responsibility to do: help him pack what was needed for the trip, remind him of safe hiking practices, and pray for him and his troop. The rest I entrusted to God and rested in his sovereign care. No amount of worrying on my part could impact the outcome of his trip. Corrie ten Boom said it well: “Worrying doesn't empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.”

And for those who are wondering, my son returned home safe and sound from his backpacking trip. And best of all, he encountered no bears!

Photo by Aubree Herrick on Unsplash

For the Heart that is Overwhelmed

This is the time of year I most feel overwhelmed. That back to school, back to sports, back to parent volunteer duties, back to driving everywhere time of year. It comes on like a deluge and I feel as though I am drowning in responsibilities and places I have to be and worries I will forget to pick someone up.

But to add a pandemic on top of it all is a whole other thing.

Your fall may look far different from mine but I would venture to say you feel just as overwhelmed. We all are. Overwhelmed by losses, changes, and the unknowns. Overwhelmed by news reports and disheartening stories. Overwhelmed by what is happening in the world and in our culture. Overwhelmed by worries, fears, and stressors. Just when we think there couldn’t possibly one more bad thing to happen this year, we learn of another event. We try to cope with these emotions by reading and sharing memes that joke about 2020. If we could, we’d push fast forward on this year and skip ahead to the next, hoping for a brighter future on the other side of December 31st.

For some of us, feeling overwhelmed stops us in our tracks. We freeze in place and struggle to make simple decisions. Others of us might get out our to-do lists in an attempt to reign in all that is out of control. Still others may turn to distractions to get their mind on something else for a change. Often, feeling overwhelmed can lead us to look to false saviors for help and hope in the midst of the chaos. To be honest, I know each of these responses well.

And I’m still overwhelmed.

One of the things that weighs me down the most when I am overwhelmed is when I look ahead to the future. Whatever it is that overwhelms me, I simply can’t imagine bearing the load day after day. My resources are slim and I fear running out of time, energy, wisdom, creativity, and strength. I look at the calendar and fear I simply won’t have what it takes to get through the coming month. I look at all the responsibilities stacked up high and worry I can’t complete them. I consider all the things that could go wrong in the days and weeks to come and my worries press down on me even more.

All too often, I live there in the future, focused on what may or may not happen. I worry about not being prepared. I fear running short. I fear not having enough, not being enough, not doing enough. In doing so, I forget that God is greater than anything that may overwhelm me. I forget who he is and what he has done. I forget his extravagant grace in providing what I need most: salvation from sin. I forget he is Jehovah Jireh and all the times he has provided for me in the past. I forget how he has strengthened me in my weakness, sustained me in trials, and carried me in my sorrows.

I also forget that his mercy for me is new each day and his well of grace never runs dry. He is the source and wellspring of all that I need to live for him in this crazy and chaotic world. In fact, he’s already provided everything I need to live a life of godliness (2 Peter 1:3). Yet, rather than trust in God to strengthen and sustain me each day, I’m like the Israelites who collected more manna than they needed, thinking they would store it up for the next day—only to find it rotten and inedible. I live my life on the insufficient fumes of my own resources instead of the grace God generously provides.

The truth is God doesn’t call us to depend upon ourselves; he calls us to trust in him to provide what we need to live for him. He gives us just what we need for each day and promises to be there on the next to provide for us again. And he is not stingy with his grace, for as John wrote “he gives us grace upon grace” (John 1:16). God doesn’t tell us what tomorrow brings; rather, he calls us to follow after him, trusting he will lead and guide us. The Israelites did not know the path through the desert; God led them as a pillar of cloud by day and of fire by night. He leads us today by his word and his Spirit at work within us. We may not have a map or know what tomorrow brings, but we are assured God is with us and will give us just what we need.

For all the hearts that are overwhelmed today, we need that gentle reminder that God is far bigger than whatever overwhelms us. He owns all things, keeps all things, and sustains all things. May we live in his grace today.

Three Certainties for Uncertain Times

Uncertainty. If there’s one word I would use to describe this year and life during a world-wide crisis, it’s uncertainty. The dictionary defines uncertainty as “being in a state of regular or constant change.”

Sounds about right.

Just about everything is uncertain these days. Health. Jobs. The economy. School this fall. Things change on a daily basis so there seems little in which to plant our hopes or expectations for the future. It’s hard to know what or who to depend upon—or believe. And with all the uncertainty comes a host of questions which swirl around our mind each day. Will I get sick? Will someone in my family get sick? How bad will it be? What will happen to my job—will I even keep it? What will school be like for our children this fall? And always percolating in the back of our mind is the big unknown: When will things ever return to normal?

As believers, we are not left on our own to navigate through uncertain times. While uncertainty is hard and challenging, we do have hope. We have certainty even in uncertain times.

Three Certainties for Uncertain Times

God Does Not Change: At times of uncertainty we have to return to what is true about God. We have to reminds ourselves of his character. One of God’s attributes is that he does not change. Malachi 3:6 says, “For I the LORD do not change; therefore you, O children of Jacob, are not consumed.“ God’s people had sinned against him but he did not destroy them because of the covenant he made with them. His promises stood firm. Theologians called this unchanging nature of God his immutability. Nothing about God can change. He can’t become less holy or righteous or merciful than he is. He can’t gain more wisdom or be more just than he already is. He won’t stop loving us or providing for us. He is the same, yesterday, today, and forever (Heb. 13:8).

In times of chaos and constant change, God’s immutability is a fixed and steady truth for us to cling to. We can trust his promises for us will stand secure. We can know his word remains forever. We can trust that who God is in his character and being is the same today as it was when he called Abram out of Ur and when Isaiah saw him seated on the throne of heaven. He is the same God who sent the eternal Son to live and die in our place. God is the same promise-keeping, grace-showering, life-giving God, today and always.

God is Sovereign: God is not surprised by all this uncertainty. He is not taken off guard or caught unawares by the chaos. He has not gotten busy with some other task in the universe and returned to find the world a giant mess. God is sovereign. He is the supreme sovereign. “…for I am God, and there is no other; I am God, and there is none like me, declaring the end from the beginning and from ancient times things not yet done, saying, ‘My counsel shall stand, and I will accomplish all my purpose’” (Isaiah 46:9-10).

The One who flung the stars across the galaxy, the One who breathed in man the breath of life, is the One who rules over all he has made. As Christians, we can take great hope in knowing that God is sovereign over all details of our lives. Nothing and no one can thwart his good plans for us. He is at work in the midst of all the chaos, confusion, and uncertainty, orchestrating all things for our good and his glory (Rom. 8:28-29).

God is With Us: Even more, God is present with us in the chaos. The meta-promise of Scripture, “I will be their God and they shall be my people” was fulfilled in Christ when he took on human flesh and lived the life we could not live and died the death we deserved. Immanuel— God with us— brought order to the chaos of this world by healing all that was broken. He reconciled us to God. There are now no barriers between us; we can come to the throne in confidence and find help and grace in our time of need (Heb. 4:16).

Before our Savior returned to heaven, he promised a Helper would come. The Spirit has come and now lives within us. The very presence of God resides in our hearts. He comforts, guides, teaches, convicts, and trains us in righteousness. God is with us! Whatever the chaos, whatever the uncertainty, whatever the unknowns, we are not alone. We are held safe and secure. No evil can threaten to undo us. Let our hearts rejoice that God is near.

This is an uncertain time. There’s no telling how long it will go on. But as believers, we are not without hope. In the midst of uncertainty, we have a certain hope in our great God who is unchanging, sovereign, and present with us. May we rest in these certainties today.

For the Distracted Heart

When this crisis began, I came across various memes describing what people in the past accomplished during times of quarantine. Big things like plays, works of art, and scientific discoveries.

I thought that since I was home bound and all of life was put on hold, I too would devote my extra time to some things I’ve wanted to do, but just didn’t have the time to do. I thought I’d finally take up a paintbrush and create something beautiful. I thought I’d write and generate more content than I knew what to do with. I thought I’d finally learn to make my own pasta and organize the school room closet.

Not so much.

A Distracted Mind and Heart

While I have accomplished some things, those big things I thought I would do did not come to fruition. Mostly because my mind was so distracted. I had difficulty focusing and concentrating on the tasks at hand. I found myself thinking more and more about our current situation. I found myself dwelling about the future and wondering what it would look like. I found my mind consumed about things like our health, the contents of my pantry and refrigerator, my husband’s job, and how to help my children navigate this upheaval to their lives.

In Matthew 6, Jesus preached that all too familiar passage about the worries and cares of this life. It’s one of those passages I know so well, I take it for granted. I no longer stop and focus on what it means. Given my distracted mind, I thought it was time I return to it once again.

“Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing?” (Matthew 6:25).

The Greek word for anxious in this passage is merimnaó which means to be pulled apart. To be divided. Distracted. Older translations say “to care for.” This is a good description of my experience these past couple of months. My mind has been divided as I’ve chased down “what if?” rabbit trails. I’ve been concerned about many things. I’ve put my present energies into future cares.

When Jesus mentions things like food and clothing in this passage, he is speaking about being anxious about the cares and concerns of this life—the whole of our life here on earth. This includes all the things we worry about in life, including our health, our needs, and our future provisions.

He then uses a logical argument of deduction, arguing from the greater to the lesser. Is not life more than food? Is not the body more important than the clothes we wear? Martin LLoyd Jones comments on this argument,

“The argument is a very profound and powerful one; and how prone we are to forget it! He says in effect, ‘Take this life of yours about which you are tending to worry and become anxious. How have you got it? Where has it come from?’ And the answer, of course, is that it is a gift of God…So the argument which our Lord uses is this. If God has given you the gift of life—the greater gift—do you think He is now suddenly going to deny Himself and His own methods, and not see to it that that life is sustained and enabled to continue?”

Paul uses a similar argument in Romans 8:32 and it is one of my favorite verses, “He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?” If God provided for the biggest and most important thing we could ever need—our salvation from sin—how can we think he would fail to provide what we need right now? Because he rescued and redeemed us from our greatest fear—eternal separation from God—we can rest assured he will meet us in our current worries and cares.

Safe in Our Father’s Care

Jesus then switches to a lesser to greater argument:

“Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin,  I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith?” (vv.26-30)

In this section Jesus has us look at two common features of his creation, things we see every day. He moves our gaze to the skies to look at the birds. God provides the food they need to eat each day. They are just birds, how much more so will he provide for us? He then has us consider the lilies of the field—the wildflowers commonly found in Israel. God clothes them in garments more beautiful than that of Solomon, how much more so will God provide for our daily needs?

This should make us pause and ask, why does God provide for us? Jesus tells us: “and yet your heavenly Father feeds them…” God is our Heavenly Father and we are his adopted children in Christ (Gal. 3:26-29). We are children of the King. We have all the rights and privileges that come with being his children. We are his heirs of all things.

Take a moment to consider the significance of your adoption. Consider all the ways a parent strives to meet a child’s needs. Consider the love human parents have for their children. How much more so is God’s love and care for us! How much more holy and perfect is that love and care! That’s why Jesus tells us not to worry, for we are held safe in the hands of our Father in Heaven. J.I. Packer wrote that “adoption is the highest privilege that the gospel offers…Adoption is a family idea, conceived in terms of love, and viewing God as father. In adoption, God takes us into his family and fellowship—he establishes us as his children and heirs. Closeness, affection, and generosity are at the heart of the relationship. To be right with God the Judge is a great thing, but to be loved and cared for by God the Father is a greater.”

Jesus concludes, “Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you” (vv. 31-33). What a freeing thing to know that because we are God’s children, we do not have the same concerns or cares as those do who are apart from Christ! We don’t have to worry about the future. Our minds do not have to be distracted or divided—as those who do not know the care of God for them. Our adoption in Christ frees us from focusing on all the “what if’s?” of life. Instead, we are freed to seek first the kingdom of God. We are freed to focus our minds and hearts on who God is and what he has done, knowing that our Father will meet all our needs for this life.

These truths in Matthew 6 are ones I need to remember when my mind is distracted and divided with worry. These are truths I need to remember when I fret about the uncertain days, weeks, and months to come. God is my Father. He is with me in the present and holds my future secure. I can trust he will provide for me, no matter what the future holds.