A Life Update

It’s been a minute.

I haven’t blogged in a while and thought it was time for an update. Life has been a whirlwind of change in our house and it’s taken some time for me to adjust to the new normal. A year ago, I changed jobs and started working full time for my alma mater. My work this past year has involved a decent amount of travel all over the country which has been fun, but also an adjustment for my family. About the same time, we sold our house, moved into a rental, and before long, started building a house in Tennessee where we will move later this year. They say moving and starting a new job are two of the most stressful things in life. No kidding!

Meanwhile, our youngest is about to graduate from high school and I’m processing what it means to launch him out into the world. It’s one of those happy-sad moments of life. This school year so far has been filled with all the “lasts.” Last birthday at home. Last football game. Last homecoming dance. I’ve seen the empty nest season of life on the horizon for a while now but all of a sudden, it’s nearly here. I admit I have some trepidation and uncertainty about it and remain prayerful for the Lord’s comfort and wisdom as I walk through it.

Despite my work schedule, I’ve managed to continue speaking at women’s ministry retreats. Last year I spoke in California, Virginia, New Jersey and lots of places in between. Next year will be ten years since my first book released on the Psalms of Lament and I’m so grateful that I continue to teach on the topic at retreats and other speaking engagements. I also continue to speak about the fear of the Lord, union with Christ and one another (biblical friendship), and parenting.

The past year I’ve participated in a few different group writing projects, including a devotional for teens and two study Bibles. I look forward to sharing about them when they are released later this year/early next year. I also continue to edit and manage the PCA’s women’s ministry blog, enCourage. I love connecting with writers and mentoring them through the writing process. This month, I’m hosting an event for writers at the PCA’s annual women’s ministry conference. It’s an event I’ve hosted each year for almost a decade!

It’s not lost on me that many of the things I’ve written about over the years (and speak about!) are things that I am working through right now and will so for a while. Change. Transition. Uncertainty. Loss. Community. As I let go of one season of life and step into another—in another state!—I know the Lord is with me and trust Him to provide all that I need for all that He calls me to. “His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of him who called us to his own glory and excellence” (2 Peter 1:3).

That’s my life update. What is God doing in your life these days?

Photo by Maksim Shutov on Unsplash

The Encouragement We Really Need

While riding my exercise bike one morning, I listened as the online trainer talked about difficulties he had overcome in both physical training and in life. He then said something like, “whatever you are going through, you will get through it, if you just believe in yourself.”

“Just believe in yourself.” It’s a phrase we hear all the time, so much so that it seems true. After all, if I don’t believe I can do something, like say run a marathon, I likely won’t try that hard to train and therefore won’t finish the race. But what about other things we face in life? Does belief in oneself help someone when their spouse betrays them? Does belief in oneself make the cancer go away? Does belief in oneself pay the bills? Does belief in oneself rescue us from our fears? Does belief in oneself save us from sin, restore us into right relationship with God, and bring reconciliation to broken relationships? (Those are rhetorical questions, by the way.)

The Bible cautions against belief in oneself and often calls such belief idolatry. That’s because it is the Lord alone who delivers his people. It is the Lord alone who is our strength and shield, our life and hope. That’s what the writer of Psalm 121 wrote in this Psalm of Ascent. When Israelite pilgrims journeyed to the temple in Jerusalem for sacred celebrations and worship, they sang specific psalms along the way. Our family once visited Israel and as our bus traveled from the Judean countryside, up the steep and winding roads to Jerusalem, we recited these same psalms together, including Psalm 121. It is a psalm which reminds us to keep our gaze set on our only source of hope in times of trouble.

And it’s not ourselves.

Psalm 121

I lift up my eyes to the hills.
From where does my help come?
My help comes from the LORD,
who made heaven and earth.

He will not let your foot be moved;
he who keeps you will not slumber.
Behold, he who keeps Israel
will neither slumber nor sleep.

The LORD is your keeper;
the LORD is your shade on your right hand.
The sun shall not strike you by day,
nor the moon by night.

The LORD will keep you from all evil;
he will keep your life.
The LORD will keep
your going out and your coming in
from this time forth and forevermore.

The pilgrim’s journey to Jerusalem likely paralleled the daily troubles of life as they faced danger and uncertainty on the dusty roads. There were often thieves lying in wait, looking for travelers from whom they could steal. The desert sun bore down on them. Wild animals were a concern. In their journey, God’s people trusted in their covenant making and keeping Yahweh to keep and preserve them, both in daily life and in their travels to the temple, to the place of God’s presence. In this psalm, we see that their hope and help was found not in created things—and certainly not in themselves—but in the Creator (v.1). He is the omnipotent God who spoke and light appeared. He is the one true King who reigns over the universe and nothing happens apart from his sovereign purpose and will. He is not man that he should need sleep (v.4), therefore he keeps his people always in his care. He is like the shade one seeks when the sun beats down on weary travelers (v.5-6). And more, he keeps his people from all evil (v.7). What a gracious and merciful God!

Six times this passage tells us that God “keeps” his people. The Hebrew word used means to keep, preserve, protect. And it’s not just referring to his people as a whole, but to “you” as an individual. God keeps you in his sovereign care. God protects you from evil. Another thing that stands out is that God alone is our keeper. Nothing in this psalm references things that we do, only what God does for us. He is the one who watches over us. He is the one who keeps and preserve us. He is the one who ensures we endure to eternity. He is the one “who will sustain you to the end, guiltless in the day of our Lord Jesus Christ” (1 Cor. 1:8).

In our culture, it sounds encouraging when someone attempts to motivate us by saying “you’ve got this” and “believe in yourself.” The Bible disagrees. There’s no power in those words. There’s no power inherent in us. Apart from Christ, we can do nothing (John 15:5). But the God of all power, the very Creator himself, has called you to himself and he will keep you. That’s real encouragement. “From this time forth and forevermore.”

Photo by Robert Bye on Unsplash

Looking to Eternity

I once overheard someone comment about midlife saying, “There is nothing more to look forward to.”

When you are young, it seems like life is an open highway stretched out before you. All the big events of life await: graduating high school, going to college, getting your first job. Then you may aspire to get married, have children, and grow in your career. At some point, the road of life narrows. It seems like you’ve accomplished many of the goals and big milestones of life.

Now what?

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. Perhaps because I just finished up eleven years of homeschooling and launched my oldest off to college. As my husband and I helped my son move into his college dorm, we couldn’t believe it’s been thirty years since our own college move-in day. When we walked across the campus, memories seemed to pop out from every hallway and building. We marveled at the passage of time. In a few years, we’ll launch our youngest son. What’s next after that? Is it true that there’s nothing more to look forward to?

Sinclair Ferguson, in his book, Devoted to God, comments that for the non-Christian “the future seems long and the past short. Slowly that perspective changes. Eventually the past seems to have been all too short. And now the future seems short too.”[1] We see this in our culture. The young think they have all the time in the world. Until they don’t. Then they live life looking backwards, remembering their glory days, and clinging tightly to the remaining time they have left.

But for the Christian, time is lived differently. Ferguson says that the Christian “lives from the future into the past.” [2] We live in light of eternity, in light of our future glory. Everything is viewed through the lens of what God is doing in the present to prepare us for our future with him forever. Whatever challenges and trials we face today are the material God uses to transform us into the image of his Son. And each day brings us only closer to the day when we will be like him—to when we will see him face to face.

This means that there is more to look forward to, not less! For those of us who have met many of life’s milestones, there is an eternity ahead for us. A brand new highway awaits, one on which we’ve never travelled. And it’s a highway that never ends, it goes on forever. This is hard to imagine. We are bound by time, by the seconds, minutes, and hours that tick by every day. But there is a glorious future ahead. For the Christian, we look forward to the day when we are shed of sin once for all. We look forward to resurrected bodies in the New Heavens and New Earth. We look forward to worshipping our King on the throne, surrounded by believers of all time. We look forward to glory, perfection, unity, and joy unimaginable.

No doubt, the passage of time on this earth is fast. It seems like yesterday our future was wide open and we couldn’t wait to see what awaited. As the years and decades pass, it’s tempting to view life as though the best has already come. But the best is still to come! Christian, your eternity awaits.

“So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal” (2 Cor. 4:16-18).

[1] Ferguson, Sinclair Devoted to God p. 219

[2] p. 219.

Photo by Felipe Giacometti on Unsplash

Who Shepherds You?

I have a framed photo hanging on my dining room wall that I picked up while in Israel a few years ago. It was taken in the early 1900’s and shows a shepherd with his sheep gathered on the Mount of Olives, in the Garden of Gethsemane. The shepherd sits there with his sheep, looking toward the city of Jerusalem and the temple mount.

I love this photo, not just because it reminds me of my trip, but also because it reminds me of my Good Shepherd, Jesus Christ. On the night before he was betrayed, Jesus also stood in that Garden and looked toward the temple—its smoke billowing out from the repeated sacrifices made for sin. But not for long, for he would soon become the final sacrifice as he laid down his life for his sheep.

My pastor is preaching through the book of John and he recently asked the question: “Who shepherds you?”

John wrote about Jesus as the Good Shepherd and my first thought when asked such a question was: “Of course, the Lord is my Shepherd.” After all, as Jesus said in the book of John: “I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep” (John 10:11). He also knows me and I know him (v.14). He calls me and I follow him (v. 27). He gives me eternal life and no one can take me from him (v. 28).

But the question my pastor asked has to do with other shepherds in my life. Other voices I heed. Others who call out to me and I follow after them. Others who influence and shape my heart. Others who offer alternate paths to life. Others who offer hope and rescue from the cares of life. These shepherds are not those appointed over me by my Good Shepherd, but those who seek to lead me astray. The more I think about it, the more I realize the number of lesser shepherds in my life. Those voices who call out to all who will listen to follow after them: podcasters, bloggers, social media influencers, cultural leaders, and the like. There are also fictional shepherds, those who don’t exist in the flesh, but whose stories in movies, television, and books influence the heart and mind with falsehood. There are even shepherds who use the name of Christ to speak a false gospel and seek to lead God’s people astray.

While at a recent college tour with my son, one of the college staff pointed out that college professors seek to make their students like them. He asked us to consider, “Who do you want shaping your student’s heart?” For educational leaders too can be like shepherds, gathering a flock of sheep who follow after them in their teaching.

Anyone or anything that speaks not the words of the Good Shepherd is a thief come to steal, kill, and destroy (John 10:10). The question is, who shepherds my heart? Who shepherds your heart? Is it the One who truly knows his sheep? The One who calls them each by name? The One who lays down his life for them? Or is it some lesser shepherd, whose words and influence lead not to life, but to death?

May we listen and follow after our Good Shepherd, for he alone knows the way to life.

“The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness
for his name’s sake.” (Psalm 23:1-3)

Missing a Place I've Never Been

Our family enjoys traveling to visit and tour new places. Whether it’s a city in another part of the country, or another country altogether, we love visiting places we’ve never been. Many of our trips include learning about the history of a place and exploring the beauty of God’s creation. Often, the kids and I will do a unit study on a place, digging into its historical past and its unique culture before we visit. We’ll read both fiction and non-fiction books about the place where we are headed. We’ll learn about the food and talk about the meals we want to try. We’ll also research places to walk or hike during our trip, places where we can witness the creative hand of God. Then we’ll spend months preparing for and looking forward to our trip.

Last year, like everyone else, all our plans to travel were cancelled. I’ve since felt a strong tug to get away and explore the world. I recently watched a travel show about a place I was scheduled to visit this year, but has since been cancelled. As I watched the tour guide explore this place, I felt a twinge of grief. I felt sadness over missing a place I’d never been to before. I felt a longing to be in that place.

The Germans have a word for this feeling: Fernweh. It means a “longing for distant places,” coming from Fern which means “distance” and wehe which means “ache or sickness.” So literally, fernweh means “distance sickening.” It can also refer to the longing for a place you’ve never been to. A place you’ve long dreamed of. A place you know you’ll love.

Perhaps, even a place where you know you belong.

More and more, I have a longing for another place I’ve never been. This longing is shared by all believers, past, present, and future. It’s the place of our citizenship. The place where our Savior now sits at God’s right hand. The place where shalom is ever present and the glories of God are on magnificent display. The place that is our destiny.

Heaven. Our true home.

“But our citizenship is in heaven, and from it we await a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ, who will transform our lowly body to be like his glorious body, by the power that enables him even to subject all things to himself” (Phil. 3:21).

I’ve felt this fernweh more and more as the place in which I pilgrimage grows increasingly foreign to me. I’m reminded that I don’t belong and I never will. I’ve felt this longing more and more as I consider Christ and who he is and what it would be like to be in his presence. I’ve felt it as I grieve over my sin and long to be shed of it once for all. I’ve felt it more and more as I contrast this life and the one to come. The more my grip loosens on the things of this world, I long all the more for the next.

When my family and I plan a trip together, we spend time preparing for it. We learn all we can about where we are headed. We learn about the ways of the people and place. We set aside money to invest in the costs associated with the trip. We count down the days until we leave. Oh, that my heart would do this and more to prepare for life in eternity! Oh, that I would store up treasures in heaven, rather than invest in things that will not last!

The feeling of fernweh may one day soon pass once vacations and travel become the norm again. But I pray that my fernweh for heaven never ceases. May I always feel that “distance sickening” until the day I enter the gates of glory.

“If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ who is your life appears, then you also will appear with him in glory” (Col. 3:1-4).

Calvin on the Christian Life

If you could sum up the Christian life in one phrase, what would it be? It seems an impossible task. The entire Christian life in just one phrase? After all, if you’ve ever explored a bookstore and walked down the Christian Living aisle, you know just how many books are written on the subject. Thousands upon thousands. Each of my own books fall under this category. So how could anyone sum it up?

In John Calvin’s Institutes of the Christian Religion, he sums up the Christian life in two words: self-denial.

Why self-denial? Calvin reminds us that we are not our own. “Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own” (1 Corinthians 6:19). Our Savior redeemed us from slavery to sin and made us his own. We are united to Christ. We belong to him and are not our own masters. We now live for him. We are to let his wisdom and will rule our lives, not our own. Calvin writes: “We are God’s: let all the parts of our life accordingly strive toward him as our only lawful goal.”

A Life of Self-Denial

What does this self-denial look like? It’s the opposite of self-love. It is devotion to God. It is a life lived for his honor and fame. Calvin says self-denial is not about seeking the things that are ours, but that which is the Lord’s. We live for his glory. He writes: “For when Scripture bids us leave off self-concern, it not only erases from our minds the yearning to possess, the desire for power, and the favor of men, but it also uproots ambition and all craving for human glory and other more secret plagues.” For those of us who know the burden of the fear of man or who worship the idols of affirmation and success, the call to self-denial frees us from those things. It frees us from wondering what others think of us or for striving for the acceptance and affirmation of others. We already have God’s approval and acceptance. We are freed instead to live for God and his glory, to strive for the things that make him great and give him the honor he is due. This is gospel freedom!

Further, Calvin says this self-denial is seen in soberness (self-control), righteousness, and godliness. Paul describes this in Titus 2:11-14, ”For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation for all people, training us to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age, waiting for our blessed hope, the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior Jesus Christ, who gave himself for us to redeem us from all lawlessness and to purify for himself a people for his own possession who are zealous for good works.” God not only saves us by grace, he also trains us by his grace to put off our sin nature and put on self-control, righteousness, and godliness. We live a life of self-denial as we cast aside our former way of life, denying what comes naturally to us in our sin nature. We are new creations, re-made into the image Christ, the one who bore the cross for us and calls us to take up our own crosses and follow after him (Matt. 16:24).

These efforts at self-denial have an end in sight. In this Titus passage, Paul reminds us of our hope in glory. We live in self-denial as we wait for Christ’s return and eternal life with him. As Paul says elsewhere, we are in the world, not of it. We are pilgrims, traveling in this world as citizens of another country. And when Christ comes to bring us to our true home, we’ll shed our sin once and for all. Don’t you look forward to that day?

Benefits of Self-Denial

In the Institutes, Calvin also writes of the benefits of living a life of self-denial. One benefit is having the right attitude of humility toward others, of counting others above yourself (Phil 2:3). Calvin reminds us that all we have and all that we are come as a gift of God’s grace; we cannot boast in ourselves. We are called to honor one another, do good to one another, and show forbearance to one another.

Calvin says this self-denial necessarily leads to seeking the benefit of our neighbors. The more we deny ourselves, the more we seek to help others. We are open handed and generous with what God has given us. We help others, not because they are inherently good or because they deserve it, but because of the image of God in them, “the image of God…is worthy of your giving yourself and all your possessions.”  

Another blessing of self-denial is that is helps us bear adversity. Calvin says there are many hard things in life that take place: “various diseases repeatedly trouble us: now plague rages; now we are cruelly beset by the calamities of war; now ice and hail…” In the face of such hardship, Calvin says many wish they had not been born, they rail against God, and accuse him of cruelty. But for the godly, for those who know they belong to God, “he alone has duly denied himself who has so totally resigned himself to the Lord that he permits every part of his life to be governed by God’s will.” No matter what happens, we trust in the grace of God, knowing he will meet all our needs, for we are the sheep of his pasture.

I’ve only highlighted a few things from this section of Calvin’s Institutes on self-denial in the Christian life. His work provides great devotional reading and I commend you to it. Above all, Calvin emphasizes the grace of God in Christ for us. The work of self-denial is not an outward work, done in the strength of the flesh, but an overflow of the inner work of a heart transformed by the grace of God. Ultimately, it is the process of shedding our old selves, and putting on the new self. It is conforming to our Savior, Jesus Christ.

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