I’ve spent a lot of time in the Psalms these past couple of months. Primarily, because we are discussing the laments in the virtual support group I facilitate, but also because it’s what my own heart needs right now. I need the psalmist’s raw honesty to help me give voice to what’s going on in my own heart. I need to know I’m not alone in my feelings of loneliness, isolation, fear, disappointment, and sorrow. I need certainty in these uncertain times and the Psalms point me to what is true and unchanging.

As I thumb through the pages, there’s a repeated theme throughout the Psalms. Whether the psalmist is singing praise and thanksgiving or crying out in lament, there is oft repeated word or phrase he uses to describe who God is. The psalmist refers to God as his shelter and refuge. He describes God as a rock, a fortress, a stronghold.

“The LORD is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer, my God, my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold” (Psalm 18:2)

“For you are my rock and my fortress; and for your name’s sake you lead me and guide me” (Psalm 31:3)

“Be to me a rock of refuge, to which I may continually come; you have given the command to save me, for you are my rock and my fortress” (Psalm 71:3).

In practical terms, a rock is a place to hide behind. Its clefts and caves provide shelter from beasts and storms and enemies. A rock is also a foundation upon which we stand or build. It is solid and sure. Rocks are used to build walls and fortresses to protect those within. A massive rock, like a mountain, is immovable; It stands firm through the fiercest storms and battles.

So it’s no wonder the Lord is referred to as a rock. It’s one of his many names found in Scripture: “The Rock, his work is perfect, for all his ways are justice. A God of faithfulness and without iniquity, just and upright is he” (Deut. 32:4). Used figuratively, this name reminds us that we can run to God when we are afraid. We can seek safety and security in him. He is our dwelling place (Deut. 33:27). He is our protector and refuge from the ferocious storms of life. He is our savior and rescuer. And while all around us is chaos, our God is unchanging and constant. Steadfast. Strong. Sure. Faithful. Everlasting.

It’s also no surprise that Christ is referred to as a rock as well. Paul tells us in 1 Cor. 10, that Christ was Israel’s spiritual rock during their desert wanderings “For they drank from the spiritual Rock that followed them, and the Rock was Christ” (v.3). Christ is also referred to as the cornerstone of the church. Just as a building’s corner stone holds two walls together, Christ joins the church together (Ephesians 2:20). “Therefore thus says the Lord GOD, ’Behold, I am the one who has laid as a foundation in Zion, a stone, a tested stone, a precious cornerstone, of a sure foundation: ‘Whoever believes will not be in haste’” (Isaiah 28:16).

Christ is the fulfillment of all God’s promises to be our rock and fortress. He is our true shelter and dwelling place. He is the answer to the psalmist’s cry for salvation and deliverance. He rescued us from sin and death. He united himself to us through faith in his life, death, and resurrection. He made us his own. He is our place of safety. Our refuge. Our strength. Our fortress.

We don’t have to go far to seek refuge in Christ, for he’s made us his dwelling place. His Spirit lives within us. The same Spirit who raised Christ from the dead is the same Spirit who encourages our weary hearts, strengthens our faith, exhorts us when we sin, and transforms us more and more into the image of Christ. What an amazing thing to consider! When we need shelter and refuge, he is so near to us—just a prayer away!

This reminder has been such an encouragement to my heart during these uncertain times. Just dwelling on God as my rock settles my distracted mind. Knowing that Christ is my refuge and that he is always with me gives me hope. I pray it does for you as well.

Father in heaven, You are my rock. My shelter and place of safety. You are my firm foundation. You do not change. Nothing can move you. I thank you that in Christ, I am safe. He is my refuge and my fortress. Nothing and no one can snatch me from him. May these truths be my comfort and strength in these uncertain times. In Jesus’s name, amen.

This year has brought with it new opportunities and experiences for me. The Lord has provided a role for me on the national women’s ministry team for the PCA. I also took my first seminary class in January at RTS. I’ve had more opportunities to write and speak than ever before. I’m amazed at the Lord’s provision for these things. I’m excited about them and look forward to participating in them.

But at the same time, my weakness is ever before me.

To be honest, I wavered over the decision to register for seminary. When I finished graduate school in 2002, I said I’d never go back to school. Never say never, as they say! But part of me wonders, can I handle learning something new at my age? Will I even understand what I am learning? Can I perform at the level of the other, much younger students?

I feel my weakness in the other opportunities as well. I see all the areas in which I am lacking. I feel insufficient and unprepared. I fear letting people down, making mistakes, and being found out as an interloper. A fake. A fraud.

This semester, my kids and I have been reading and discussing the book of Exodus (we’re using Kristen Hatton’s book, The Gospel-Centered Life in Exodus). I see myself in Moses. God visited Moses in the wilderness where he had fled after killing an Egyptian. He told Moses he would use him to rescue the Israelite’s from slavery in Egypt. Like me, Moses had lots of questions. Why me? Who am I? Don’t you know my weaknesses? And most importantly: Who are you?

When I give my children instructions and they respond with questions and say “Why do I have to do it?” or “I can’t because _____” or “I’m not ready,” I’m not so gracious. But God met Moses’ questions with grace. He met him with his very self. God told Moses all he needed to know. “God said to Moses, ‘I AM WHO I AM.’ And he said, “Say this to the people of Israel: ‘I AM has sent me to you.’” God also said to Moses, “Say this to the people of Israel: ‘The LORD, the God of your fathers, the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob, has sent me to you.’” (Exodus 3:14-15).

The most common name for God in Scripture is LORD, written in all capital letters in our Bible. It is YHWH, which we pronounce Yahweh. The Jews had such reverence for this name of God, they never said it out loud; instead they used the name, Adonai.

It is this name, Yahweh, that's used in Exodus 3 when God tells Moses his name. It’s an important passage because God is defining himself for Moses. He is telling Moses he has always existed and is not dependent upon anyone else. In Hebrew, the word is in the future tense, “I will be what I will be.” God is not a created being; he has always existed. John Calvin wrote concerning this name, “he claims for himself eternity as peculiar to God alone, in order that he may be honored according to his dignity… that our minds may be filled with admiration as often as his incomprehensible essence is mentioned.” God doesn’t rely on anything outside himself to keep and sustain him, as we do. This name also tells us that God is unchangeable; he always is and always was. It was also this name, Yahweh, I AM, that Jesus used in response to the Jews in John 8: "Jesus said to them, 'Truly, truly, I say to you, before Abraham was, I am'" (v. 58).

Calvin also wrote that knowing God’s name gave Moses confidence in his calling: “Wherefore, in order rightly to apprehend the one God, we must first know, that all things in heaven and earth derive at His will their essence, or subsistence from One, who only truly is. From this Being all power is derived; because, if God sustains all things by his excellency, he governs them also at his will. And how would it have profited Moses to gaze upon the secret essence of God, as if it were shut up in heaven, unless, being assured of his omnipotence, he had obtained from thence the buckler of his confidence? Therefore God teaches him that He alone is worthy of the most holy name, which is profaned when improperly transferred to others; and then sets forth his inestimable excellency, that Moses may have no doubt of overcoming all things under his guidance.”

When I think about my own callings, knowing who God is gives me confidence and peace. Like Moses, I can’t do anything apart from God. I don’t have what it takes within me. I don’t have the wisdom, strength, or experience. But when God calls, he enables. He gives what is needed to accomplish his will. He meets us where we are with all that we need. He meets us with himself. And as he provided Moses with a staff and the support of his brother Aaron, he gives us gifts and the Body of Christ so that we are equipped to carry out our callings.

I am weak indeed. But just as God used Moses—in spite of his weaknesses—so that his glory might be displayed, I know he can do the same in me.