Encouragement for Parents When Life Mutes Us

When my son was about four years old, he had to have what was then considered a risky surgery for his age. We drove two hours to a university hospital where a doctor that specialized in the treatment he required performed the surgery. I still remember the doctor describing how the surgery would take place and all the potential harmful things that could happen. I remember sitting in the hospital waiting room for it to be completed, tears streaming, as I simply prayed, “Please, God.”

I was all out of words. I could only plead for God’s care for my son.

When Life Mutes Us

As Christian parents, we know our children need our prayers. God uses those prayers—not because he needs them—but because in his mysterious providence chooses to use them as a means to carry out his will. 

And so we pray. We pray for our sick child to be made well. We pray for wisdom when we encounter a parenting dilemma. We pray for our child’s protection from evil. We pray for God to open the blind eyes of our child’s heart so that he might see his need for Jesus and come to a saving faith.

Yet we know there are times in our lives as parents when we are so overcome by emotions that it’s hard to put words to what is happening. The challenges and heartaches we encounter with our children can leave us unable to voice what is going on in our hearts. We feel so distraught, so fearful, so brokenhearted that we can hardly utter a word, much less pray to the Lord all that needs to be said. We are left muted.

There are also times when our own sin gets in the way of our prayers. We are stubborn in that way, refusing to see the truth of our idolatrous hearts. In those times, we may look for ways to solve our parenting troubles on our own, rather than seek God and his will. We may trust in false hopes to lead and guide us. Rather than stopping to pray, we may even insist that we had every right to respond the way we did when our teen showed up past curfew and we failed to model the gospel by seeking forgiveness for what we said. 

Whatever keeps us muted, God is ever gracious still.

To read the rest of this post, visit Rooted Ministry where I am writing today.

Photo by Olivia Snow on Unsplash

Helping Teens Navigate Social Media

When I was a teen, I spent many afternoons at my friend’s house. We’d arrive after school, rummage through the pantry for our favorite snacks (anything filled with artificial colors and flavors!), plop down in front of the wooden television set and watch the latest music videos of our favorite big hair bands. Later that night, we’d call each other on the phone. I’d use the one in the hallway outside my bedroom, snaking its mustard yellow spiral cord underneath my door for privacy—assuming no one else was using it—and we’d talk for hours about anything and everything.

Much has changed in the life of teens since that time; much more has changed in technology. The challenges, temptations, and issues our teens must navigate in the age of the smartphone are mind-boggling for those of us who still remember when phones were mounted to the wall. Even more, our teens need parents who understand these challenges and are intentional to walk alongside them in it.

The Way Teens Communicate Today

My husband recently assumed that one of our teens communicates with his friends by talking on the phone. He was wrong. Teens today don’t call each other; they are likely to use an app to communicate. For those of us who remember how foundational long conversations over the telephone were to our adolescence, this is totally foreign. It seems like an entire form of communication has been cast aside all together for a visual medium, where teens connect via abbreviated text, memes, and images….

To read the rest of this post, visit Rooted Ministry.

Communicating with Your Teen

Do you remember those first early weeks with your newborn—when you were trying to understand what each and every cry meant? Does she need a diaper change? Is he too hot? Bored? Tired? Sick?

Eventually you got it down and figured out more than just what your baby’s cries meant. You also knew that when she rubbed at her face a certain way it was time for a nap or that when he needed a fresh diaper his faced turned a strange shade of red as he cried out. You got to the point where you knew the difference between boredom and irritation, hunger and tiredness.

Then came the two’s and three’s when your child could speak in words but still couldn’t express themselves. Instead of verbalizing to you that she was feeling disappointed or frustrated or over-tired, she threw herself on the floor in the middle of the grocery store.

Or maybe that was just my children…

Fast forward a few years and it seems like you are back to square one. Your child is taller and has more life experience under his belt. His voice isn’t the high-pitched scream of an angry two-year-old, but the deep voice of a soon-to-be man. Your daughter talks and communicates all the time now—just not with you.

You’ve hit the teen years and it’s like you have a different person living under your roof. Someone so new, it’s like you need to learn all over again how to communicate. Just what do those eye rolls mean? Why does he always mutter, “Boomer” under his breath? How can you get your teen to respond to you with more than just “Good” or “Okay” when you ask about his day?

To read the rest of this post, visit Rooted Ministry.

Praying for Your Teen

What are your prayers for your teen?

Perhaps you pray for your teen’s GPA to improve? Or maybe you pray that they would make better friends? Or that they would get into a good college? Maybe you pray that your teen wouldn’t make any of the same mistakes you did?

Or you simply pray that you both would survive adolescence?

Many parents joke (or even groan) about the teenage years, about their teen’s irritable and one-word responses, about their messy bedrooms (I’m guilty of this one!), or about their questionable prospects for the future. Some parents may worry about their teen’s friendship choices or about their grades. Still, others may just throw up their hands in defeat, saying “Nothing I do or say has any effect.”

No doubt, parenting can often be difficult. Hard even. Parenting teens can sometimes feel like a whole other level of hard. But just like all our parenting, we are dependent upon the Lord for wisdom, strength, and grace.

We can’t parent alone; we need the Lord to move and work in the life of our teens…To read the rest of this post, visit For the Family.