Idols of the Heart: 12 Questions to Ask Yourself

When my kids were young, I had them do a craft project to teach them the concept of idolatry. I talked to them about how we try to fill our hearts with things we think will make us happy. As part of the craft, I had them lay down on a huge sheet of paper and I drew an outline of their body. I then drew a circle shape on the chest of the body. I gave them a pile of magazines and told them to find words and images of things people might love more than God. They were to cut out the images and glue them on the space on the paper. It was interesting what my kids instinctively recognized as idols. They found images of dollar bills, food, television, phones, and toys and glued them on the paper. I then had them decorate their ‘person’ however they wanted. They added hair, a face, and clothes. One of them drew on a hat.

But the thing that stood out to me most was the frown they added to the face, symbolizing that idols do not bring happiness.

My book, Idols of a Mother’s Heart, explores idolatry in our lives, particularly as it relates to motherhood. While we might all mentally assent to the fact that we worship idols in our lives, we don’t always know what those idols are. Sometimes, it’s easier to identify idols other people may worship than it is to identify our own. How do we know what idols we worship? How can we identify and name them?

In my book, I provide twelve questions we can ask ourselves. These questions give us the opportunity to explore our hearts and see what those things are we might turn to for life, hope, and meaning outside of Christ.

Twelve Questions to Help Identify Idols in the Heart

1. What do you spend your time on? The things we value and cherish most are what we dedicate our time to.

2. What do you spend your money on? What we invest our money in is often an indicator of what we love most.

3. What are your strongest emotions? (Such as fear or anger) We often respond with strong emotions when our idols are threatened or we can’t access our idols.

4. What controls you? Our idols often define and rule our days.

5. What do you fear losing? What we think we can’t live without is often an idol.

6. What do you trust in to make your life better? Idols often become our refuge, what we turn to for help and hope.

7. What are your ‘if-only’s? Fill in the blank: “If only _____ happened, then my life would be better.”

8. What sin or sins do you constantly battle? Whatever we worship, whatever we love more than God, we will sin to obtain it.

9. What areas of your life seem out of control? Often the places we attempt to control reveal idols.

10. What barriers do you face in your life, keeping you from what you want? God often puts up barriers to keep us from our idols, to bring us back to himself.

11. What do you expect out of life, from yourself, others, and God? Our should’s and ought-to’s often reveal idols in our heart.

12. What do you feel self-pity about? We often feel sorry for ourselves when we can’t get what we want, revealing idols in our heart.

Take time to consider your responses to these questions. Pray through them and ask the Spirit to open your eyes to see what you may love and worship apart from God. Talk about it with a trusted friend or mentor and pray together for the Lord’s work in your heart, to evict those idols and replace them with love for your Savior.

A Prayer for the New Year

I love new things. Who doesn’t? A new book, a new job, a new experience. Even the smell of a new car. I love new possibilities and new opportunities. I love considering all that the “new” holds.

But to be honest, I often have mixed feelings about new things. What if that new book isn’t that great and I regret buying it? What if the new job is worse than the last? What if the new experience falls flat?

And what if the new year I’ve looked forward to is harder than the previous year?

When I consider this new year—365 empty days waiting and ready to be filled with growth, opportunity, and adventure—I feel a mixture of excitement and anticipation, as well as some worry and apprehension. I look forward to what God will do in my life, the things I will learn, the ways he will stretch me and use me. I look forward to opportunities to be with family and friends and perhaps even make new friends. At the same time, I wonder about the hardships ahead. There are difficulties I face now that will likely intensify next year. There may even be unexpected difficulties ahead as well.

While I don’t know what 2019 holds, I do know the One who holds it.

A Prayer for the New Year

Father in Heaven,

I come before you today feeling a mixture of anticipation and worry. It’s exciting to turn the calendar page to a fresh new year. It’s exciting to consider all that the year holds. I look forward to new opportunities and growth. But at the same time, I wonder what heartaches and challenges lie ahead. And those heartaches I’ve faced this year, I wonder if they’ll continue into the next. I worry I won’t have the strength to endure unexpected change or trials. I guess I’m really not unlike the Israelite’s when they faced an uncertain future away from slavery and thought returning back to Egypt was a safer bet.

Forgive me for my worries and fears about this new year. Forgive me for doubting your goodness and faithfulness. Forgive me for forgetting your constant grace to me and fearing it won’t be there when I need it in the future. Forgive me for forgetting who you are.

While this new year may be filled with transition and change, you are the same yesterday, today, and forever. You never change and your promises remain true through every age.

While I don’t know what this new year holds, you are the Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. You know the end from the beginning and every moment of this year to come. You know what 2019 holds and just what I need to journey through it.

While I may worry about unknown challenges, and fear I am not ready to face them, you are a good and faithful Father. You only do what is good. Whatever the year holds, it comes from your goodness and will be for my ultimate good.

While circumstances in my life may feel out of control this year, you reign supreme on your throne. You rule over all things. Nothing can happen outside your will and plan. You will never be surprised by anything that happens in 2019.

Help me to rest in who you are this year. Help me to dwell on your goodness and faithfulness. Help me to rely on your sovereign power, knowledge, and rule. Help me to remember that you’ve gone to great lengths to meet my deepest need by sending your Son as a sacrifice for me—how could I think you wouldn’t meet any of my lesser needs? Help me to look at 2019 with hope and trust, knowing that whatever it holds, it is a gift from your good hands.

This new year may be filled with new adventure, change, and opportunity. It may also have some challenges and trials. But every new year is a reminder that you are making all things new. This new year will push forward your Kingdom here on earth and your ultimate return. That is something “new” I long for with great hope and expectation.

I pray all this in Jesus’ name, amen.

The Idol of Parenting Success

We live in an age of overachievement. It affects adults and children alike. Alarming research shows that anxiety and depression in kids is at an all-time high. Teens report levels of stress higher than adults.

As a culture, we push our children not just to do their best, but to be better than the best, to stand out above their peers. Children spend their days pursuing excellence in sports, academics, and myriad other activities—all with the expectation of getting into the best college, followed by the best job, and then, ultimately, a happy life.

As a culture, we are worshiping the idol of parenting success. This idol tells us we must be perfect parents and place our hope in creating perfect children. Like many idols, though, the idol of parenting success can be difficult to identify because it’s an idol crafted around something good.

Good Thing

Being a parent is an important job and one we should care about doing well.

We should strive to care for our children’s needs, to teach them, to discipline them, and to prepare them for life. We should want our children to do their best in school, to grow and thrive, to develop into people who can care for themselves. As Christian parents, we should seek to teach and disciple our kids in the faith so they would know and love the One who created them. These are all good things.

It’s also true that parenting well doesn’t happen accidently; it takes intentionality and purpose. We have to learn what our children need and how to care for them. We must pursue wisdom in our parenting decisions. We may even need to utilize particular techniques or strategies.

But how do we know if our desire to be good parents has morphed into an idol that has gripped our heart? And where should we turn for hope instead?…To read the rest, visit The Gospel Coalition.

Singing Mary's Song of Thanksgiving

"My soul magnifies the Lord, and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, for he has looked on the humble estate of his servant. For behold, from now on all generations will call me blessed; for he who is mighty has done great things for me, and holy is his name. And his mercy is for those who fear him from generation to generation. He has shown strength with his arm; he has scattered the proud in the thoughts of their hearts; he has brought down the mighty from their thrones and exalted those of humble estate; he has filled the hungry with good things, and the rich he has sent away empty. He has helped his servant Israel, in remembrance of his mercy, as he spoke to our fathers, to Abraham and to his offspring forever." (Luke 1:46-55)

This familiar Christmas passage is often called Mary's Song or the Magnificat which is Latin for magnify. Mary sings this song in response to Elizabeth's exclamation of blessing to her when she arrived for a visit and when John the Baptist leapt in Elizabeth's womb, "Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb." Mary sang this song to magnify or to extol God. When we magnify something, we make it bigger, so we can better see it. Like a magnifying glass. Or when someone is put up on the jumbotron at a ball game, so everyone can see their silly dance. In the case of this song, Mary is narrowing in on the greatness of God. She is filled with wonder at what God is doing and can't help but bubble over into praise.

What makes this song all the more remarkable is the challenges and trials she likely went through before her visit to Elizabeth. She had probably been ostracized by many in her community. We don't know how her family responded, but they had every legal right to reject her, or worse. We know from the book of Matthew that Joseph wanted to divorce her after he heard the news of her conception. We should also remember where Israel is in her history. Since the exile, they have not had a king on the throne. The prophets have been silent since Malachi. Romans rule the world and their land. So in many ways, it's a dark time, for Mary and for her people. Yet as we see, she sings a song filled with wonder and thanksgiving…

To read the rest of this post, visit Reformation 21.

Why We Give Thanks

Thanksgiving. It's the season where we join together with friends and family around a table spread with food. We give thanks for the blessings in our life and recall all the good we've experienced during the year.

For some of us, it may be hard to think of things for which we are thankful. Life may not be going well. We may be in the midst of deep heartache, a season of suffering, or wandering through a dry desert—with no oasis in sight. 

Gratitude isn't only for those who have everything they've ever wanted and whose dreams have all come true. As believers, we are called to give thanks in all things and in all circumstances. If your heart wonders, "What could I possibly be thankful for this year?" consider this list:

Five Reasons to Give Thanks

1. God is Creator: We give thanks because God is our creator and sustainer. Each breath we take comes from him. Acts 17:25 says, "nor is he served by human hands, as though he needed anything, since he himself gives to all mankind life and breath and everything." Giving thanks acknowledges that we are dust and that everything we have comes from God; we can do nothing apart from God's grace.

2. God deserves and is worthy of our thanks and praise: God is holy, righteous, and good. He is worthy of all honor and praise. "I will give to the LORD the thanks due to his righteousness, and I will sing praise to the name of the LORD, the Most High" (Psalm 7:17). "Great is the LORD and most worthy of praise; his greatness no one can fathom" (Psalm 145:3). No matter what is happening in our life, no matter the challenges we may face, there is always a reason to give thanks—because God deserves it. We can thank him simply for who he is. And when we don't give thanks, when we hold back because our life isn't turning out how we'd like it to, we actually rob God of the praise and glory he is due.

3. Scripture calls us to give thanks: Paul tells us to "rejoice in the Lord always" (Philippians 4:4) and to "give thanks in all circumstances for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you" (1 Thessalonians 5:18). Giving thanks to God is something believers are to do all the time, not just once a year in November and not just when life is going well. Rather, it ought to be the continuous posture of our heart. When life is challenging, we often wonder what God’s will is. The Bible tells us: give thanks.

4. Because of all God has done for us in Christ: Our greatest reason to give thanks is because we've been brought from death to life. God has shown his goodness and faithfulness to us through the death of his Son on our behalf. Because of Christ, we have been adopted into the family of God. The list of benefits and joys associated with having new life in Christ is endless. What we have in Christ is reason enough to give thanks. "Therefore let us be grateful for receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, and thus let us offer to God acceptable worship, with reverence and awe" (Hebrews 12:28).

5. It's what we were made for: We were made to worship, praise, and give thanks to God. The Westminster Confession says that the chief end of man is to glorify God and enjoy him forever. Giving thanks is one of the ways we bring God glory. It's also how we enjoy him. The beautiful thing about doing what we were created to do is that it gives us great joy. Knowing God and responding to his wonder and glory by returning thanks for who he is and what he has done, brings us deep and abiding joy. It's the kind of joy that anchors us during difficult times. Even when the sorrows of life cut into our life, we still have joy—a joy even in the midst of our tears because we are known by our Maker and Creator.

This Thanksgiving, there really is much for which to give thanks. From our very life to eternal life; from God's goodness to his steadfast love; from Christ's atonement to membership in the Body of Christ; from the wonder of knowing God to the deep joy of being known by him, the reasons are many. May giving thanks to our Lord be the joy and posture of our hearts this Thanksgiving and every day throughout the year.

For Those Who Struggle With Change

My life seems to be changing at a faster pace than usual. If it were possible, it seems as though someone pushed fast forward on the movie of my life.

And I find myself unsettled by it. Out of breath at times. Spun around and disoriented.

I took my oldest to the pediatrician for his annual visit and learned that he is 5 foot 11. How did that happen? Last I checked, he was still 5 and playing with Matchbox cars.

I look in the mirror each morning and swear new lines and spots have appeared overnight. Not only that, but ever since I hit forty, my body has become a traitor. Every year there’s some new physical issue to deal with, some new thing that needs medical attention.

Good things are happening in my speaking/writing ministry, but sometimes the pace is faster than I can keep up with.

The world and culture around me often seems like a snow ball rolling down hill, growing bigger and stronger and unstoppable. I often feel out of place and out of touch. I wonder, how did we get here?

I don’t know about you, but I’m not such a big fan of change, as least change I don’t have control over. I certainly like new experiences, as long as they are ones I’ve pursued and chosen, and that they arrive at a time that best suits me. In truth, I like to know what to expect. I like to be prepared. I like when things are manageable. I don’t like to be overwhelmed or uncertain or ill-prepared.

And so, with my life in fast forward mode, I’m clinging to what is certain and steady. To what never changes. I’m looking to the horizon to keep me afloat in the whirlwind. I’m looking to God, the One who never changes.

Our God Never Changes

Unlike our lives, the Bible tells us that God never changes. “For I the LORD do not change; therefore you, O children of Jacob, are not consumed” (Malachi 3:6). The same God who spoke and light broke into the darkness is the same God who rescued his people from slavery. The same God who chose Mary to bear our Savior is the same God who met Peter on the shores of Galilee and said, “Feed my sheep.” The same God who gave grace to David in his sin is the same God who forgives us when we cry out in repentance. Yesterday, today, and forever, he remains the same.

The God who greeted Moses in Exodus 34 with, “The LORD, the LORD, a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness, keeping steadfast love for thousands, forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin” does not change in his character. No matter how much time passes, no matter what is going on in the world, our God— who he is—does not change. That means we can trust him to always be steadfast in faithfulness, generous in love, and rich in mercy. He is always good and always does what it right and just.

God’s Word Never Changes

Because God never changes, what he says does not change. Everything in his word remains true for all eternity. All that Scripture tells us about our world, our fall into sin, and what God did to save us, will never change. What the Bible tells us about who we are, what we need, and how God provides it, will never change. Whether people agree with God’s word or not, has no impact, for it is firmly fixed forever, “Forever, O LORD, your word is firmly fixed in the heavens” (Psalm 119:89). Into all eternity, God’s word remains: “Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will not pass away” (Matthew 24:35).

This means that all God’s promises for us will never change as well. When everything is changing around us, and it feels like we are riding in some kind of crazy spinning tilt-a-whirl, God’s promises to us in his word steadies us in the tumult. Promises such as: “For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 8:38–39) and “I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ” (Philippians 1:6) and “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9).

Change is part of life. Some change is good— the kind we look forward to and have long prayed for. Sometimes change comes into our life and knocks us over. There may even be seasons of life where changes come at us quicker than we can respond. But no matter the change, we can find rest and peace in our God who never changes. He remains trustworthy and faithful. His word and promises anchor us. Let us look to him.

Photo by Jerry Kiesewetter on Unsplash